Contentment

It's been 2 weeks since we committed to the Compact, and the topic of contentment has really been on my mind. It's no wonder that so many of us struggle with it. As a nation, there is discontentment around every turn. We are constantly looking for a bigger house, a better car, a more exciting job...we are told every day by advertisers that we NEED all of those things...or we will be LESS than everyone else. Less successful. Less pretty. Less desirable. Have you ever paid close attention to those feelings that are created when you are looking at advertising or at something in a store? They are not happy thoughts. Thoughts of wanting, needing...the feeling that you are somehow deprived of the true joy in life if you don't act now. When I go into a store, I am now acutely aware of those feelings...because I cannot act upon them. I look at an item, and then I stop and examine the thoughts running through my head. Pretty crazy stuff. I've been trying to eliminate all sources of advertising in our lives over the last year or so...and it's been an eye-opening experiment. I knew that the obvious offender was the TV. But the others are not so easily detected. What about advertisements in magazines? What about the magazines themselves? Looking through magazines like Country Home, Real Simple, and others...I see so many things that I WANT. Oh the goodies! What about magazines like Health or Self? Looking at the women in those magazines will only create discontentment with your body. Now take a look in your mailbox...Crate and Barrel...J.Crew. More WANTS. Look in your email inbox. You will see passionate pleas for your to open their message. Sales! Buy now...before it's too late! The Sunday newspaper sales ads...full of STUFF to buy. Billboards that scream at you as you drive. And the most stealthy method of all...your friends. When you go to their house and see that they have something that is sooooo cool, you want it too. Even if you don't need it. I experienced this just yesterday. I was at a girlfriend's house. She has a rug that I was looking at buying a couple months ago, but decided against it. And even though I have a perfectly great rug now... for a moment, I thought that I needed that same rug because she had it.

As silly as it sounds, and as "strong" as you think you might be...it's so easy to get sucked in by all of these things. You may not act on your "wanting" impulses right away, but it's those feelings that just pile on top of one another, creating discontentment and desire, and pretty soon you're buying a McMansion and filling it with goodies from Pottery Barn.

The mall is another temple of wants that I try to avoid at all costs. The term "window shopping" is really quite silly. They should just call it "driving myself crazy by making myself want things I can't afford". And now they don't just make malls, they make "Lifestyle Centers". Made specially for you to MAINTAIN your lifestyle. They make it hard to leave...with the food, coffee, playgrounds, lakes, trails, movies, colleges (yes, in a mall), you do just want to LIVE there.

For me, contentment is clearly a spiritual issue. In the past, whenever I have gone on a spending binge, it has been during a spiritual dry spell. I also tend to spend a lot more when Matt on a trip and I am lonely. I spend to fill a void in my life...to feel "happy". That void should be filled with my relationship with Christ, not with stuff. But for some reason, buying stuff (even just a fancy coffee) changes my reality at that moment, but it's a temporary fix.

I like what Joyce Meyers has to say about this topic:

Contentment is a decision to be happy with what you already have. One dictionary defines the word content as "rest or quietness of the mind in the present condition; satisfaction which holds the mind in peace, restraining complaining, opposition, or further desire, and often implying a moderate degree of happiness."

We usually learn to be content by living discontented lives for a long time and then finally saying: "Lord, I don't want to live this way any longer. Getting this thing or having that thing is not worth it.

"I don't want to be miserable anymore. Just give me what You want me to have because unless You want me to have it, I don't want it.

"From now on I'm not going to compare myself with anyone else. I'm not going to be jealous or envious of anyone. I don't want what anyone else has. Lord, I want only what You want me to have."

The 2 things that really stick out to me:

• She says that contentment is a DECISION. It does not come naturally. Don't beat yourself up if it's a struggle for you...but you can overcome it.
• "Restraining complaining, opposition, or further desire". Further desire. Sometimes my whole mind is one big desire. I desire to be this, I desire to have this, I desire to be in another place, I desire a bigger or smaller this or that. To be content is to STOP all of those feeling that roam around your brain taking away energy. Energy that could be spent on the NOW. Enjoying your life for what it truly is. It's energy that could be spent getting to know Jesus better.

Here are some verses that speak about contentment. I am going to meditate on these verses and memorize them throughout this year as we take part in the Compact.

Not that I am implying that I was in any personal want, for I have learned how to be content (satisfied to the point where I am not disturbed or disquieted) in whatever state I am.

I know how to be abased and live humbly in straitened circumstances, and I know also how to enjoy plenty and live in abundance. I have learned in any and all circumstances the secret of facing every situation, whether well-fed or going hungry, having a sufficiency and enough to spare or going without and being in want.

I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me [I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him Who infuses inner strength into me; I am self-sufficient in Christ's sufficiency.

Philippians 4:11-13

Don't be obsessed with getting more material things. Be relaxed with what you have. Since God assured us, "I'll never let you down, never walk off and leave you," we can boldly quote,

God is there, ready to help; I'm fearless no matter what. Who or what can get to me?

Heb. 13:5, The Message

Better is little with the reverent, worshipful fear of the Lord than great and rich treasure and trouble with it. Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a fatted ox and hatred with it.

Proverbs 15-16-17

Though the fig tree does not blossom and there is no fruit on the vines, [though] the product of the olive fails and the fields yield no food, though the flock is cut off from the fold and there are no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will exult in the [victorious] God of my salvation.

The Lord God is my Strength, my personal bravery, and my invincible army; He makes my feet like hinds' feet and will make me to walk [not to stand still in terror, but to walk] and make [spiritual] progress upon my high places [of trouble, suffering, or responsibility]!

Habakkuk 3:17-19

Wow. Such a complex topic...I feel as if I have hardly touched the surface. But everyday that I resist the urge to buy stuff, I get a little more content with what I already have. Baby steps. Thank you Jesus for being patient with me!

What's YOUR Footprint?

No, not your shoe size. Your ecological footprint. I've taken the footprint quiz before...but Jessica's blog reminded me how much I love to try to lower my score. Right now, my footprint is at 5 acres. In comparison, the average footprint in the U.S. is 24 acres. Worldwide, there are enough resources for each person to have 4.5 acres. So that puts me .5 over my "allotted" acres and now I must REDUCE so I can stop using up more than my share of the resources! Here are some other changes that I would like to make:

• Eat a completely vegan diet. I have eaten a vegetarian diet for a little over 2 years now, but have gone back and forth between vegan and vegetarian. For those of you that don't know, a vegan is someone who eats no animal products at all (no milk, eggs, butter, etc.)
• Walk more. This is a little harder in the wintry cold and ice...especially because our neighborhood is very hilly! I will implement this more in the summer. It's so easy because we are within walking distance to everything.
• I have always wanted to use public transportation more. However, Des Moines has a really poor system. I have contacted the metro transit authority with route questions, etc. and I want to try it soon! I am definitely not used to riding the bus, so it will be an experience. It takes more time and planning, but I love the idea of it. Much more relaxing than driving myself. There is a possibility that we will park the bus this winter and become a one-car family again, so the bus may be a necessity!
• Focus on buying only package-free foods and less processed foods. Right now our only "processed foods" are chips, bread, almond milk, and cereal. I'm not counting condiments. I would like to start making my own bread again, make my own almond milk more consistently, my own granola, and my own chips. Does anyone know of any good tortilla chip recipes!?
• Reduce, Reuse, Recycle... I am learning more about this everyday. I am actively reducing my belongings and I am reducing the amount coming in (The Compact). I am re-using plastic bags, jars, clothes, I use cloth everything in our household, and I recycle everything that is allowed.
• I would like to be even more conscious of my energy and water consumption.

There will always be something to "work on" when you're living green...but that's what makes life fun!

Photo credit: Flickr/pingnews.com

Kids and Commercialism

Tonight I spoke at our local chapter of Holistic Moms Network about "Parenting in a Commerical Culture". We had a great turnout and a lively discussion about the challenges facing parents in a culture where advertisers are actively fighting for your child's mind. Much of the conversation centered around television viewing and the merchandising of cartoon characters. It was clear that everyone felt the pressure to conform to mainstream culture, but that they were taking steps to push against it. I am very fortunate to have such mindful and intelligent mamas to bounce ideas off of and turn to for support. Here are some action tips on this topic from the New American Dream*:

• Get rid of the TV.
• Expose kids to other media - surrealist films, conceptual art exhibits (carefully selected), gatherings of interesting adult friends with non-mainstream stories to tell.
• Remove the logos from clothes, theirs and yours. Talk with kids about why you're doing this. Suggest to kids to design their own, personal logos.
• See a wonderful passage on commercialism and consumerism by Brian Swimme
• Parents who resist consumerism for themselves are the ones who teach their children to resist it.
• Teach children to be doers and creators rather than shoppers and buyers.
• Supply them with sidewalk chalk, old cardboard boxes and other makings of creative play.
• Grow your own food. Involve the kids. Teach your child of the connections within the natural world. Experience their beauty together. Talk about where things come from, who made them, what they are made of.
• Teach by example and conviction a set of values that allow kids to make their own choices.
• Teach kids empathy for others. Instead of buying toys, suggest they spend the money bringing some groceries to the local food bank.

*I used a handout from New American Dream that was full of great resources, websites, etc. They are a really neat grassroots organiziation on a mission. Check them out!